Have a conversation without a single question.
Questions change your energy flow, do you want to know how?
As you develop mindfullness, you perceive more details about your body and mind mechanics. The questions are something we use daily and they are a powerfull tool to direct your energy flow of all types, mental and emotional, physical and others as you name them.
When you pose a question in a conversation with another, your organism is being directed towards an awaited input. Your mental focus is sharp, ready to analyse “any” possible answer. Your emotions are by default prepared to be set in motion in accordance with the answer you will perceive. Your organism is signalling to the other that it is ready to reveive the input.
Depending on the development of your self-awareness, you can be quite flexible when it comes to reactions to that answer you inquired about. But. Every time you pose a question, you create an energetic connection that has its own design. The question will always make you work, make you wait to receive the answer, it does direct your attention outwards.
If you wish to use questions, try to observe yourself in this event as many times as you want and you will realise that the question to another is an indulgence of the brain. What I mean is that, apart from really few basic, supersimple questions, everything that your brain wants to ask about it should refraze and save you the trouble of redirecting your attention to the outer source of stimuli.
If you want to see the difference, try to conduct the conversation without questions. Simply and casually tell someone that this is something you want to try, at least on your side.
And here you may see the first radical difference: you do not ask their opinion on this, nor ask you to join them. You do articulate your wish, an idea that came to you and you create an open-ended invitation. You might notice the tension or lack thereof in another. You can further observe if you can speak about your wishes and your affairs without being asked to do so. You might see differently the dynamics of the interaction and the flow of freely shared information. You might see how you feel about yourself while you speak without that safety net. You will regulate the attention that you pay to the other person and theirs for you.
The basic premises of this kind of exchange are:
Energetic autonomy
Return to the self-regulated stress management in contact with others
Free sharing without obligations
The discovery and cultivation of an actual common ground (and reduced reliance on creating temporary adjutments to others)
True SELF (SOUL) expression
Reduced expectations and mental curiosity in contact
Reliance on feelings, flow and mutual will to express the selves.
The ubiquitious self-knowledge that you can build on that single act can astonish you. You will be amazed how differently you will see conversations with others. You will be amazed by the fact that many people you know actually do express themselves like that already. Maybe you will notice that about your own self. Maybe you will experiece the deeper layers of interactions with others simply because you won't allow your mental focus to command your attention the anxious wait.
I wish you the truest experiences and lots of joy and your own precious feelings on the way.